How to tell if it was a gunshot or fireworks: gunshots don’t echo, fireworks do.
thaNK YOU SO MUCH
the fact that anyone might commonly need to know this terrifies me
clearly you’re not from america
"your dress is too short."
thanks, the designer used your dick for inspiration.
here’s a tip: if you start dating a depressed person, don’t be surprised if they are still depressed while they are dating you.
they’re not depressed because they’re single, and you are not an all-powerful cure for mental illnesses. just be there for them.
wow i can’t believe lesbians shove their boobs up each other’s vaginas
My next million dollar idea: reluctant exercise videos with people who aren’t perky.
"Just five more… I know, I kind of want to die right now too, but let’s just power through it."
"Okay, new yoga pose. It’s going to ache like a bastard until your hamstrings release, I’m not gonna lie."
"Stretch a little deeper… it’s okay to yell ‘fuck’ at this point, I won’t tell anyone."yes
also could the world quit telling bisexual people that theyre pansexual okay if a person identifies as bisexual theyre fuckin bisexual, if a person identifies as pansexual then theyre fuckin pansexual youre not the fuckin orientation police
ATTENTION: I need attention